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Public affairs in the office

29th September 2015


Who said that it is important to never mix business with pleasure? Well, whoever it was, they were talking through their hat as everyone completely ignores this advice. For instance, how many affairs are there going on in your office right now?

If you work alone, this is a silly question, although I guess it isn’t unheard of for PR people to be madly in love with themselves!

If you do work in a normal office (if there is such a thing), then there is probably at least one ‘secret’ dalliance going on. And as Diwali parties usually spark off bad behaviour, there is bound to be some more intrigue coming up soon.

Now, I don’t want to spoil anyone’s fun, but watching love blossom in the office is nauseating. Those involved always think they are being discreet, but everyone knows. The good thing is that it does provide something to gossip about.

But should you really want to keep your private affairs private, here are some tips:

  1. Don’t think that coming into work separately fools anyone. We know you left the party together because of the way you ‘casually’ greet each other, and ineptly follow this with the question: “Good night, last night?”. 
  2. Don’t be the last two left in the office. It is suspicious to suddenly be so keen to work late after previously having been a slacker.
  3. It isn’t clever to email your loved one at work. Not only will the office administrator read the email, you may accidentally send it to the wrong person. It has happened many times.
  4. If you take too much care to avoid the object of your passions, and never speak to them, or mention them in your conversation, then this unnatural behaviour will make the rest of the office draw the obvious conclusion …
  5. … although the opposite behaviour, being all over your love-object, is even worse. And it’s a real give away that an affair has begun if you suddenly start avoiding someone you used to be inseparable from.

Secret office affairs are annoying, but even worse are those that have gone public. Suddenly, the pair involved think it’s perfectly acceptable to look loved-up in the office. Don’t they realise that offices are supposed to be places of torture, not joy and love? Just put it away! 


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