PR Guru 2 minute read
There are many things that really get me fuming: clients, bosses, in-house PROs, journos, agencies – I could go on. But if there is one thing that creates an outpouring of rage from within me - it's self important PR lingo!
Here is my translation of the meaningless phrases you'll hear spilling out of people who don't have anything to say.
You may want to print this out and take it to meetings.
1. "Let's have a quick brainstorm after the meeting."
Translation: "I'm not completely done hearing myself talk but I have no original ideas/help/guidance to offer. Therefore I’d like you to all think of some and tell me your ideas so I can scribble them in my notepad and conveniently forget who came up with that idea when the client credit/new business comes in.”
2. Post-meeting: “You’ve missed a lot of meeting actions here. Next time, listen properly and take more notes.”
Translation: “Listen and make notes because I’m too busy listening to myself and thinking how to spend my monster wage to listen to anyone else. You’ll be doing all the work anyway. May as well write it down, eh?”
3. “What’s the rationale behind this?”
Translation: “I like the idea but I’m aware I haven’t come up with anything so I need to make you feel awkward and suggest I do have a better idea … before deciding to go with yours.”
4. “I’m not buying into this one guys? I don’t know why. It’s just not grabbing me.”
Translation: See above.
5. “We’re going to utilise our core strengths in order to leverage your world-leading solution and create a best-in-field PR campaign.”
Translation: “We do PR.”
6. “We are famous for our fun working environment. The staff is really happy.”
Translation: “We hold meet ups on Friday nights and force our staff to attend. If they don’t, they’re black-marked ‘anti-social’."
7. “We expect some flexibility in working hours.”
Translation: “We pay you for eight hours a day, you work 12… but we’ll say thanks a lot… over email."
8. “We hire staff that are motivated and career-minded.”
Translation: “Female staff must be childless and remain that way. Barren is the way forward.”
9. “Our staff have excellent potential for growth within the company. We hire people who want careers with us, not just a job.”
Translation: “We love bowing and scraping in our staff”.
10. “The account team you'll have is incredibly self-motivated.”
Translation: “They get no help from us.”