How to start a fight in your PR office
18th June 2015
Sometimes discussions can get out of hand in this office, and end up in shouting matches. People have been known to storm off in tears (not me of course, I just caught a dust storm in my eye), and I am sure the dude sitting next to me has been tempted to throw a punch on a few occasions – either that or it is the heat of the argument that is making him roll up his sleeves.
So, here are some subjects to avoid if you want to work in harmony. If you fancy a bit of drama, then I suggest you start at number one and work your way down, but not on the same day perhaps.
1. Politics. Boy, the Kejriwal-Jung row really got my office going. Kudos to the intern who dared to admit she sides with AAP. Not sure she'll get that permanent contract now though!
2. Money. Some people are richer than others are, and some other people get jealous. I myself am thrilled that my boss can afford to drive an Audi. One brilliant way to start a fight, I discovered the other day, is to ask someone how much his or her partner earns.
One obtuse bloke asked his colleague if she really needs to work, while trying to find out how much her husband earns at that newly funded start-up. Wrong on so many levels! My thick colleague deserved the jeering he received.
3. Sexism. See above, and there are plenty of other examples of throw-away remarks that can upset the women in the office. Score double points if you manage to upset everyone. All you have to do is channel your inner Sharad Pawar or any of the right wing crazies.
4. Holidays. If you work for a company where you can choose to take holidays whenever you like, lucky you. In smaller places, like my outfit, we have to make sure our vacations do not clash and the fights over who deserves to get the premium weeks in May and June can get quite nasty. I, myself, think parents should get priority booking, although sometimes I wonder why I put myself through the hell that is family holidays.
And don’t even think about mentioning religion. ..